The Female Shadow: On Female Destructiveness
Fairy tales have never been particularly sentimental about women. The dark forests are populated by witches who lure children into their houses and devour them, stepmothers who abandon children in the woods, queens consumed by murderous envy. In Hansel and Gretel, the children escape one destructive maternal figure only to encounter another: first their stepmother […]
On Longing and Going No Contact
It was through the green valley and up a green hill, Like one who was troubled in mind, I called and shouted and played upon my pipe, But no bonny boy could I find, But no bonny boy could I find. Roud Folk Song Index No. 293 To learn the old English and Scottish ballads, […]
The Losses We Don’t Know to Mourn
Some paintings seem to contain more than the subject they depict. J.M.W. Turner’s The Fighting Temeraire is one of them. The old warship, celebrated for her role in the Napoleonic Wars, appears almost ghostlike, still present and yet already fading into memory as she is towed towards her final berth. Turner himself could never bring […]
Psychological Integration in a Fragmented World: The Central Task of Modern Therapy
You hear the term everywhere now: in psychotherapy, trauma discourse, psychedelic culture, and self-development spaces alike. It sounds profound, but most of the time remains frustratingly vague. What does psychological integration actually mean, especially in a world that itself feels fragmented? Standing in a late medieval church in Northern Germany, I found myself thinking about […]
Inside the Manosphere: A Psychotherapist’s View of a Wider Relational Crisis
A Narrow Frame I recently watched Inside the Manosphere documentary on Netflix. I must confess it’s a subject I have spent time with myself, having sifted through hours of online content in an attempt to understand the psychological mechanics underpinning it. As a psychotherapist, I am also interested in how cultural shifts show up in […]
How Therapy Changes You: When Something Begins to Return
This is the last part of a four part series grappling with the stages of therapy. Many people come to therapy with very little idea of what meaningful work actually consists of, even when they’ve had therapy before. The Threshold Series is my attempt to explore this process, from recognising that something must change, to […]
Should Therapists Be Moral Authorities? The Rise of Therapy Language in Politics
I’ve been noticing a shift. As therapy language increasingly enters politics, therapists are no longer only seen as clinicians, but as moral voices, people who are expected to interpret events, take positions, and guide others toward what is psychologically “right”. But what happens to the therapeutic stance when psychological insight becomes moral certainty? This raises […]
How Long Does Therapy Take? A Psychotherapist’s Perspective
The Question Most People Ask One of the first questions people ask me when they begin thinking about therapy is a practical one: how long does therapy take, and how many sessions might they need? It’s a reasonable question. Starting therapy involves time, emotional commitment, and financial investment, so it’s natural to want some sense […]
Why Therapy Feels Worse Before It Gets Better: The Psychological Desert
This essay forms the third part of a four-part series on psychological thresholds: The Desert Phase of Psychological Change. In the previous essay, I explored why psychological thresholds are so difficult to cross. Here I turn to what can happen when we remain there long enough, and what may begin to return. The first experience […]
Looking For an English-Speaking Therapist in Berlin? What Actually Matters
Many of the people who contact me are unsure what they are looking for as they begin searching for an English-speaking therapist in Berlin. The process can feel surprisingly opaque. I hope to offer some orientation here, to make it more navigable. Berlin offers no shortage of therapists who work in English. A brief search […]